Back to work..

I wasted the first 4 days in kg feeling like crap layan my sadness and all. So stupid! Why i couldn't get over him..the one who broke my heart so badly, insincere, who took me for granted, who didn't appreciate me...who treated me unfairly..i wasted my tears for him..my precious time..and everything for him..but in the end..he left..he couldn't stand for me. Haizzz..i am just so stupid. Still all gone stupid and crazy about him. I wish there's a switch to turn off myself and turn on as a whole new person that completely over him.

It took me days to tell my mom what's happening with me. I was basicly cried senyap2 when i told her i'm in my hardest time..with all the problems i've been having. I was so angry with myself for taking time too long to get over somebody. This is the hardest breakup i ever have..part of me had lost..died.

My Mom is the best...
Then mom said..  It's ok...xpa lah...yg penting kw ikhlas sma org..walaupn macam tu org balas kita. Sempat lg tanya..ada hantar juga tu ikan masin tu hari? Hahaha..of course i sent juga..entah2 sudah dia buang kali tu sbb tlampau benci sudah sma sy..i hope not..sy bg ikhlas tu..sama parai vagu lagi. I respect lah sma my mom..after all i told her about him being a 2 timer...that he couldn't stand for me..mom said to forgive him. Waahh...i still can't honestly forgive him. But she dengan tenangnya suruh bg maaf seikhlasnya. Salute!

Burden released..
But it's was a good thing i finally spoken up to my mom about him  since last time i updated her. She convinced me that God has His greater plans. So I have to be patient..don't worry..happiness will come. Finally..i could feel some peace..at least i feel like satu bebanan terlepas..tenang sikit..dun feel right keeping things from my mom. I told someone also about my concern..the other guy. I asked him...how far he can accept someone who's had done mistakes before. He answered...as long as that person return to God, admit his/her wrongdoings and never do it again. If God can accept him/her..why he cannot. The moment he replied me so..i feel like a burden had been released also. Now..i feel there's more burdens i still carry.. To forgive..myself and him.. Oh Lord..give me strength..

The other guy...
Ok..honestly..he had given me a big relief since the last tsunami hit my life. He had been nice i guess. And each words came from him somehow just make me at ease. Syukur Tuhan..ada kwn macam ni. Happy jg skit tgh2 sedih ni. Lol...ok..lets take it easy.. Dun want to talk about him too much..nnt kena jinx!! Fingers crossed.. Tuhan lindungi dia..

Ok.. Till then..i malas da tulis hari2. Only bcos i was so free at home previously...

K..till then..