Hmm..i wrote this title a while ago when situation was a bit different. I fell like wanna screammmmmm!!! Aaarrgghhh!! ok stop! Silent scream may be not helpful here..well i can't scream now..alone at home, nnt jiran pikir i dah kena sampuk..LOL. Anyway, the reasons to scream are..

One... I got extended in Paeds!! I feel like shit! This shouldn't happen if i didn't get distracted by my personal stupid issues. I failed repeatedly in all exams. Now my life is hanging by the thread..if i fail my 3rd CEX i'll be tranferred out of Sabah...which i feared so much..

Two... No holiday at all! Nowadays, Paeds dept dun give a damn day off for the whole month..maybe year..so stupid! Even machine get its rest sometimes..urm..maybe some some machine need to works around the clock but we are human!! Are u freaking insane. I got no life like this..urmm again..not really no life but..dis is still crazy man. I dun even have time to visit my family in kampung.

Three... At home in Kg. Things aren't good. My mom got injured after she tripped and fell earlier this week. I feel so sad. I can't even go and see them because i can't get out from here. My omma called and she's so need help..my papa don't even care.. i don't know what's happening in there anymore. I feel like I'm not helping at all. I only focus on my personal issue this recent and i missed the more important matter. I hope i can get cuti the end of May..just to go back home and be with them.

Four.. Ok..personal issue. which yes..had been turning my life up side down. It's none to blame to actually.This whole time I always looking for something, someone to blame it on. I blame it on Ajushii..well he deserve to be blamed of i guess..haha..so cruel. I blame it on my job..on me! But all of the problems are my problem anyway. It's me who couldn't handle the situation. Blaming it on other just don't make the problem vanished or solved. It gave me more burdens..but for now..let's things cool down..i need t focus on how to thrive here.

ok..i need to focus on my life more..restore to my previous state..and the point to restore at is before i know Ajushii. I'm not saying that the live before that point was the best..no! i still got a lot of problems that time. But if i had the chance to rewrite the story beyond that point i would. My life would be different now i guess. Ok.. got a lot to write but later lah..in different page..

ok..to myself...keep ur head real...ur mind in sane state.. Don't be grumpy!